Anyone wonder where I've been? Jury Duty. Yay, civil cases!
Seriously, it was only worth it because it was highly interesting watching the lawyers and the judge and the entire process. The witnesses were great comic relief, most especially the doctor that supposedly walked in drunk to testify in the trial. Four days, though, and I would have welcomed the break from work, but as it was it made me miss the second week of classes, and that is never good. So all last week up until currently I've been trying to do catch up school work. It's fairly hard considering that my Technical Writing class we covered nothing on the first week, the instructor even let us go early after introducing ourselves to the class, and here it is I've come a paper due, and I've sat in on zero lectures.
Que serra, serra! Also do a multitude of catch up everything else. My agenda has included: Getting back to work and hustling to get my stats back up. I've got half of my cleaning done at home. My car still needs some real cleaning, an oil change and a new windshield. I've got a doctor's appointment this morning. I've yet to schedule my waxing (personal grooming is very important). I've caught up on emailing my instructors to see what I've missed and let them know I'll be back for this week. Also gotten back to planning Becky's bridal shower/bachelorette. I'm getting the catch up blog out of the way. And still haven't eaten breakfast. Woohoo!
Also at work I've signed up for a Spanish certification class. It's 10 different sessions every other Friday so hopefully that goes well. This is something I signed up for to complement the Spanish class I'm taking this semester. Something that will definitely help at work I'm sure.
Life is a tad bit like the calendar below. In fact, my life is the calendar below atleast for the next two weeks. Want to see me soon, pick a free time from my schedule, and call me.
Tonight, I'll be preparing for early classes tomorrow, as well as making pigs in a blanket for tomorrow's work party. I am so tired already.
"You may delay, but time will not." -- Benjamin Franklin
What happened? I had the momentum going, did I not? A great schedule, I've utilized the calendar my sup gave me for Christmas so well. Last week - didn't miss a beat. Ah! Life!
So, jury duty. They say it has to happen sooner or later. Well, it's happened and I've not been kicked out. I go back again tomorrow and I have to miss classes and work. Most people would rejoice, but I've been enjoying classes and work, damnit! I guess there's always next week.
Tonight was meant to be my last night off. So I spent it indoors watching TV shows. I watched The Hills, of course, but another show I never got to watch was Heroes and I got hooked on it today. BTW, never watch a show with a freaking fanatic. They don't shut up. I beared it up until 9pm and when my show came on I turned and tried to politely say "Don't talk during my show!" Lucky me no offense was taken and it was seemless from there.
Tomorrow I go back to jury duty as mentioned previously. I've emailed my instructors and advised my sup at work. Everything's been arranged and I look forward to another drawn out day. Except tomorrow I will be prepared and bring all my homework, and utilize my time as best I can.
Well, it's 11ish pm so I should be in bed already. Adios, amigos. Hasta luego.
I've been pretty ill this past week. Missed a bit of work, but all in all managed to get everything done, especially my school work. Friday night was Mandy's big shindig at Finn's. Tons of fun and pictures. The X made an appearance, nothing major, no real drama, haven't talked to him since. It was pretty awkward getting that look from everyone and then having to explain, "No, we're not back together." And then of course getting asked about every guy that happens to say a word or two to me. Ugh! Minor set back. Anyway, Saturday was a great day to just recover from being sick and from being drunk. Especially with all the snow that came down, it was nice to stay in and watch a movie. Today is back to business as usual. I've already gotten messages asking me where the pictures are. They will be posted following this blog. Got up early to get some homework done, and do some laundry. Hopefully, in a little bit I'll have time to catch up on my online TV shows. Tomorrow is jury duty day, and another doctor's appointment. Then Tuesday, back to school and back to work. The cycle never ends.
I've been home for about an hour and a half now. I think I worked just a little over 3 hours today. I'm pooped!
Let's start from the beginning. Woke up at 7am. Not wanting to get up. Dragged myself into the shower and drove to United Way for the outreach training program. I must have looked like a complete schmuck. I could barely keep my eyes open. I thought at first my eyes were hurting from wearing my contacts all day yesterday. It happens. But, alas, I was on my way downhill.
Training was fun. Some old schoolmates ended up being there and the little role playing was entertaining. Of course, I didn't participate. I'm cranky when I'm sick.
After training I drove back to Derby to try to get just a little nap in. Set my alarm for 2pm and tried to dose. By the time 2pm came I had a full blown headache. Called in to be late for an hour. Napped some more. An hour later, it was almost a migraine. Just sitting up was a freakin' hassle. Went to work, like I said for a couple hours and headed back. Ate dinner, contemplated on doing some homework, but really I can't. I want to sleep forever and ever.
I have to be tip top tomorrow because I don't want to miss class and Lord knows I can't miss anymore work. And really that's all I have for the night.
Lesson for the day: If you want to be a good doer of do gooding, you have to have your beauty sleep.
All day I was meaning to do stuff. Just stuff. To get ready for the week ahead. I was going to leave the house an hour prior to the Dr's appointment, just to run errands. That didn't go as well. The doctor's appointment left me feeling a bit ill. I was attacked by a killer migraine shortly after, I blame it all on the crying. Yes, there was crying, don't ask. So I got home, and I was in pain and sick to my stomach, so I napped for what seemed like forever. Good dreams, though, that's always a good sign. Woke up, watched the Golden Globes. Yay, Borat! And also the premiere of The Hills. Ah!
I did manage to make myself go to WalMart to get some food to pack. Yep! Will start packing food. In between classes and work, I'll have no time to even go through drive thru's so pack I must. I got cereal, milk, microwaveables and juices. Will need to start eating healthier now. Also, I got a lipstick. Hahahahahahaha! Yeah, seems like a joke to me too. I always go through phases where I think "Y'know, I'd be pretty if I start prettying up." That lasts usually two or three days, then I get tired of having to stand in front of the mirror for more than 10 minutes and I'm me again. If you catch me wearing perfume, then you know something important is up. Usually, it's just soap and baby oil. =D
Anyway, just a quick blog. It was meant to be longer but now I'm feeling sick again. Ewl! I have absolutely no time for this. So this is where I find out how tough I really am, right? Lots of motivation people, that's what I need. I get to see the doctor again Monday, so that should be another fun filled day.
I'm actually very nervous. I have a fairly intense doctor's appointment tomorrow. I had originally scheduled it for Friday but missed it due to everything that's come up. Can't say I regretted missing it, but then again, it's something necessary. Today I just spent the day at home. I actually altered two slacks by myself. Defeats the purpose if I'm supposed to start gaining weight, but I needed something to keep my mind of things. Whatever happens, life has to go on.
Tuesday classes start. Another nerve wracking event. I haven't had to show up for classes in person for a years. It should be interesting to say the least. This begins my hectic adjustment period. I'll have these classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. One of the classes will cause me to miss about an hour and a half of work which will be made up by working an extra hour and a half on Wednesdays.
Also this week begins the Outreach program I volunteered for through work. Have I not mentioned it yet? We'll be surveying the homeless population in Wichita. It'll be broken up into two different days. One for training and another for the actual volunteer time. It's one of my New Year's resolution to be more involved in my community. If I'm going to be out and about anyway, I might as well be out and about for good causes, right?
This Friday is Mandy's goodbye/good luck party. Mandy got a different position at a substation so we'll be throwing an event. The last event didn't get planned as well, so I'm taking it on to plan this one. I don't get off work until 11pm so it's going to be a bit of a time crunch, but hopefully all fun.
Saturday I have off, but if properly motivated I should be out getting my windshield replaced. It cracked fully last Thursday when all this snow started falling. It's a freakin' hazard, and I refuse to continue driving that way. The only thing that prevented me from fixing it this weekend was all the snow still left on the ground. I hate winter! But it's supposed to start getting sunny again by Friday so hopefully it'll be warm and nice Saturday.
Sunday should be the photo shoot. I had a ton of sexy pictures that was taken but unfortunately I don't have copies of most of them. These will be a little more professional, a lot less home made, which takes the fun out of them, but I should look just as awesome. A little reward for me, and for those who email me requesting copies =D See, that was a joke. I haven't lost my sense of humour. Hahahahahahahaha!
The following Monday I have to show up for Jury Duty. Did I forget to mention that too? Forgive me, a lot of things happen in this little world of mine, and some things eclipse the others. I have jury duty which everyone has explained I should be able to get out of due to my current employment. I called them, and they said "not necessarily" and so I still have to show up to be told whether I have to show up. Fun!
That's a brief look into what's ahead. I know I've neglected a couple emails, a couple calls, and some text messages, and I apologize. I'm trying to be less self involved but it gets pretty rough sometimes. I know there's a lot of people out there willing and able to share my burdens, but at the end of the night I have to sleep with all my demons, and no one else can help me with that. So forgive me, and understand, and pretty soon I'll be back on track again. And don't feel so neglected. I've probably failed to mention too that I blew off a lot of Guy Listers this week. Just feeling snappy and cranky and not able to handle anyone getting close to me. Everytime I go out with someone they're immediately on my nerves. So if you haven't heard from me, you should be lucky.
For the rest of the night, I'm cleaning and throwing out anything that brings me bad vibes. That's a lot of things. For one, I have an IPAQ I need to unload. Most likely will be Ebay'd. I'll also be trying to prepare all my work clothes for the rest of the week, seeing as how I have to be up and out by 8am now. Err! So goodbye staying up til 4am. I will definitely miss drunk blogging. And please don't write me off yet as someone you'll never see again. I'm sure if you give me enough notice I can plan to see each and every one of you atleast once every other week. Except for Eli 'coz he has good movies.
TJ's funeral was yesterday. The glasses have been properly returned. I have a lot of mixed emotions regarding the situation. I find it's very difficult to look Bobby in the eyes anymore, so I will probably steer clear for awhile.
I have a calendar full of to-do's. A little aftermath from trying to be too busy to sulk, which now just makes it a little too busy to breathe.
There have been other concerns that have come up, but right now are just concerns. One step at a time, right?
The next two to three weeks are already booked as it is. I go through my usual manic bipolarness during my drives to and from obligations. I may be crazy but I refuse to be irresponsible. At this point I'm just thankful that I haven't given up on showering, brushing my hair, getting up every morning, etc. Everyone has to start somewhere. A great insight from a friend at work, I don't need anymore drama in my life. I agree. But when it rains it pours.
Well, no one's going to see me fall any time soon. I'm currently experiencing a big dip in my emotional state, and I'm most positive it can only go up from here.
WARNING: This won’t make sense, it won’t be chronological, I’m drunk and I’m so lost!
What? Where do I start? At work text messaging Mr. Dreamy. Having the best time ever, because I have so much to talk about and I love talking. I woke up from the best dream, thinking “I’m so god damn lucky everything just happens for me for no reason. Regardless of how I fucked I think I might be.” Yeah, that’s me. Things just happen.
I go out to drink with Brandon. No concerns. Just the megatouch games and pool. I am me. I am always me. I’m happy and carefree, right? That’s who I’m supposed to be. I mean, what else? I’ve lived the most sheltered life. If not for all my fuck ups I would be picket fence white. Despite of all my fuck ups I am still treated as picket fence white.
I am the fakest person alive.
How fragile is life? How fucked up can it get? Do you know who I think of when I think of death? My great aunt. The one that died the year I was born. The one that I think kept haunting me in the Philippines. Only ‘coz she wanted to see me. Some guy whose funeral my mom brought me to. Me and her coworkers nephew tried to see the body but I chickened out and closed my eyes and ran. My great grandfather. Died 2 years after we moved to America. Probably still my biggest hero, and still the coolest old man ever. A suicide from a friend, I always thought of as a choice. And everyone gets a choice, I’m no hypocrite, I’ve thought of it too.
So tonight I was there. Drinking. Trying to pretend. I am lucky me. No one can cry around me, and if you see me cry you better forget it fast. I am having, supposedly, the time of my life. That is the front. Tell me, really, how many of you buy it? How many of you don’t notice me checking my phone every 5 minutes? Looking around while you tell your jokes? Do I really look like I want to be there?
Nearing last call and close to trashed, Bobby decides to swagger by. Tells me TJ is dead. Been on life support all weekend and Monday the plug was pulled. It’s a joke! It better be. I have his eyeglasses in my car. He seemed just fine. This is a fucking joke. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know how to act. I just shut down. I don’t know dead people. I’m afraid of the dark. I hold my breath when I drive by cemeteries. I have his fucking glasses. And I am the worst person in the world because he liked me. He told me he wanted to change because of me. He kept telling me everything that was going on and I didn’t care. I was so lost in my own problems, and I didn’t care. And I spent New Year’s Eve with him and I blew him off. And I didn’t care. But I didn’t know. But if I knew would it have changed?
But it doesn’t matter, because it’s a joke. I called him, and I left a message and I told him to call me back to get his fucking glasses. Because I can’t handle this. What if it’s true? And being around me he got my bad luck and Bobby says it was a heart failure. I think that was mine. If anybody’s heart has failed them, it would be mine. It’s gotta be some fucking joke. Bobby gave me a time and a date and a place for the funeral but it’s a joke. TJ will call tomorrow, and I’ll curse them both. It’s a joke.
If it’s not I can’t handle it. It won’t be funny. God is not funny. But I’m crying for no reason, because it’s a joke. I don’t know dead people. It doesn’t happen. Not to me. And who am I crying for? How many times have I wished I was dead? But if it was me, how many peoples lives would be so much better? And if it’s him, how many lives are for the worse? Maybe …. Well, it’s not true. It’s a joke. I’ll tell you. I’ll be back tomorrow morning, and he’d have called by then. It’s a joke.
I've was feeling ill for the past 3 days. I thought it was due to my current lack of sleeping, my Chi being off, bad spirits from homicide pictures - you name it. Today I am so much better. So much better! Hmmm... What could've changed? Hmmm... =D
Work is work is work...Last night was nice and steady as it has been since the new year began. After work I headed to Finn's just for one drink and one dollar's worth of games on the Megatouch. I knew J was back in town but with everything he has to do I doubted that he felt like drinking so soon after getting back in. Zac was there and we ended up trying to finish the crossword puzzle in the paper. After trying, really really hard, for about 20 minutes, I caved. I called J and was ready to leave a voicemail demanding the answers. J ended up being still awake and the conversation went like this.
HIM "What? You have to wait like everyone else?" ME "No. Just email them to me, it's better than texting you every clue to get an answer." HIM "That puzzle is syndicated, I didn't make it. We get the answers on Tuesdays." ME "Today's Tuesday!" HIM "Oh, well then I have the answers." ME "Give them to me!" HIM "I'll go to the office and pick them up and I'll be there." ME "No. Just email them." HIM "It'll take me 5 seconds to go across the street."
So we got the answers but then it was really pointless because it's not a challenge anymore. I tried to start working on next week's puzzle but I got stopped, J said he didn't want me to start getting used to being ahead of everyone. J also mentioned that Mort's now has a Wednesday thing of everyone trying to finish the crossword puzzle. I am seriously considering. Anyway, I was allowed to read my next week horoscope. And contrary to what Zac thinks, reading your horoscope ahead of time does not alter your future. Freakin' tard!
Currently considering getting ready for work, and deciding what it is I will be wearing. Oh, already decided. Anyway, video below for J complete with lyrics. Thanks for helping us cheat!
Fall Out Boy: This Ain't A Scene, It's An Arms Race Lyrics
I am an arms dealer Fitting you with weapons in the form of words And don't really care, which side wins As long as the room keeps singing That's just the business I'm in
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race I'm not a shoulder to cry on, but I digress
I'm a leading man And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate I'm a leading man And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate
I wrote the gospel on giving up (You look pretty sinking) But the real bombshells have already sunk (Primadonnas of the gutter) At night we're painting your trash gold while you sleep Crashing not like hips or cars No, more like p-p-p-parties
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race Bandwagon's full. Please, catch another
I'm a leading man And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate I'm a leading man And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate
All the boys who the dance floor didn't love And all the girls whose lips couldn't move fast enough Sing until your lungs give out
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race (Now you) This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race (Wear out the groove) This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race (Sing out loud) This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race (Oh, oh) This ain't a scene, it's a god damn arms race
I'm a leading man And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate I'm a leading man And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate
I had a dream. I was in a strange land. A vast wilderness. I went on and on, but met no one. I called, I shouted... but no one answered. I was alone. Alone in the wide world. – Hidetora
Well, where do I start. Friday night? A blur just like the night before. Seems like I’m beginning a new problem, but the first step is admitting to it right? Ah, I’ve got plans, it will all be fixed and normal soon.
Saturday I ate lunch at Hana Café with Eli. It was a pretty nice visit. I think the staff there has grown accustomed to me. The minute I walked in I was greeted with “The sushi bar is closed until noon but the owner says we can make your shrimp tempura.” Yes. Please. Thank you. I felt bad for Eli though. I rushed him to get there early and I was afraid he’d miss out. Luckily, his lazy ass didn’t get there until 11:50am so there wasn’t that long to wait.
Work was steady, as it has been since winter started. The most I can do to keep chugging along is to realize that every case is an opportunity for practice and a chance to improve my stats. If only I was in the sort of business where we could pick our clientele. Maybe then I wouldn’t go home every night dizzy from having to roll my eyes all day.
Saturday as stated previously was night out with coworkers. I met others from different departments which was beneficial since now I can put faces to names and maybe even be able to conduct business with less formalities. It’s such a drag really. The night was tense starting out but as I got a feel for everybody’s personalities I became more at ease. It doesn’t help when the two main guests at the table have already heard about you, and labeled you as “the hot Asian so-and-so has a crush on” when you’re trying to impress and be respectable. Thanks, so-and-so.
Today, I woke up with everything spinning, literally. I’m not trying to be dramatic. I got up, tried to get dressed and had to sit for what felt like an hour just to keep the room steady. Failing at that, I decided I have to get up, get out, because if something happened, no one will know to look for me, or even wonder about me, because I am so Ninja no one ever knows if I’m coming or going. I immediately went for food. Every time something feels wrong food has always been the answer. This time food helped little. Went back to bed. When I woke up again, I felt a little better. I decided to just relax and veg out in front of the TV. Watched a lot of movies: Xmen, Legally Blonde and Matchpoint. I have a crush on the Englishman in Matchpoint. Why? No Clue! Maybe because he makes funny faces. I digress.
Carla invited me to eat dinner with her, Paul, Bobby and Elron at PF Changs. It was great! Carla is always fun. She’s talking about cooking classes, I’m trying to convince her I don’t cook. I tell her “Let’s take classes at City Arts. Like pottery or photography.” I don’t remember her response. But I think we did agree about seeing Cirque de Soleil, and The Blue Man Group at the Coliseum. Woohoo!
This blog is not as organized, and I apologize. I’m not as sharp at 2:47am as I might be around 11am, but I make do. There’s a lot to catch up on and I feared I’d forget before I got a chance to sit down again. For example, I’ve learned to play darts. Brad thought me. Well, he didn’t teach me how to aim, but he thought me how the game was played. We played 501, where we each started with 501 points and tried to hit the points we needed to subtract off to get to zero. I lost both times but I do believe with more practice I can get better. As is the case with any endeavor. And I’ve been watching Japanese movies at Eli’s. Eli is into Japanese movies. Who would have guessed. Last one I watched was Ran. It’s a Japanese version of King Lear. Literary lovers beware, they sort of butchered King Lear, but the moral remains and there lies our consolation. Despite that fact it was an awesome movie. I cried. I can’t talk about it. It is a must must must see. I’m even tempted to just buy the DVD for myself.
There’s so much more but will definitely have to wait until next blog. I have Mystery Man Part Deux. As all may know I only give that label to the one that surpasses the current list, and that happens only once every 5 years. I have gossips that really can’t be posted, so call, and we’ll chat. I have pranks to pull, decisions to make, and dreams I have to share, but not right now. Not when my pillow beckons for me.
Alright, so it’s the 5th morning of the year and I’ve been out every night so far. Not doing so good on my New Year’s resolution right? Well, no worries, I plan on punishing myself with some overtime during the weekend. Maybe. Or maybe I’ll just finish reading Crime and Punishment, finally.
Last night I had a dream I was one of those ribbon acrobats. I could do all sorts of tricks up in the air. It really felt like a great workout. Like I could kick ass. Then I woke up and all I feel like doing is watching my Ugly Betty episode online and contemplate whether I should password protect my website or not. Hmmm… Most times I question why I’m still trying to get my Comp Sci degree. Then I notice how I spend 90% of my time in front of a computer, 95% if you count the MegaTouch machine, and I realize it’s meant to be. I may never be able to work with Voltron, as was my childhood dream, but maybe just maybe I can do a little contract job for the Transformers.
I probably won’t go out again this month, except for some left over social obligations. Saturday I’ll be out with coworkers, for a coworkers thing. And Sunday I should be out to Jezebel’s with some friends. I’ll Flickr any good photo ops, so all you online stalkers better get your fill then. For the rest of the month I will try out the nunnery. Maybe start the whole coffee thing again. Do some pretend self reflections. Or just sleep a lot. Sleeping helps you gain weight right? I should try that out.
Ah, right so the short recap on the Guy list. The Guy List is on vacation, not to resurface again until I get a handle on the online stalker issue. Some day, he will lose interest. Some day. This dating thing is all so hit and miss really. I feel I should have some sort of application process.
Are you self-conscious and are you going to expect me to fix that?
Can you watch an entire TV show without talking about what the characters are doing in the TV show?
Are you suffering from a picked-upon-syndrome that you developed in high school and never got over?
If I told you to just shut up and let me finish, would that be a problem?
How many people do you think would actually fill out an application? How many people do you think would answer them honestly? I should really have an application, and then include job requirements and duties, so three months down the line I can pull out their file and say “I’m sorry but you were hired based on the understanding that you were able to fulfill THESE duties.” =D I'm so serious too. Okay, everyone mass email me potential application questions, it must be done.
Besides all that, I am actually starting to enjoy my little fall break. Whereas earlier this week I was so excited about classes, now I'm wishing I had one more month. It's starting to really hit me that I have to show up for these classes. Lord knows how well that worked out before. But I have 11 more days of semi-freedom. I guess I'll just make the most of it. Like right now, I'm planning on grabbing some food and eating in front of the TV. Exciting huh? I've found that when you live the kind of life I do, always out and about, it's the quiet times that become more memorable. What? Who said that? Where the hell did that come from?
Because I'm lacking sleep and because I can, I'm posting the same blog on two different sites. Wanna fight about it?
I realized just about 30 minutes ago, before I was compelled to click "Post New Blog" that I am surrounded by grown ups. Grown ups playing grown up versions of childish games. Really doesn't look that fun from this side. Tell me how this goes again? I got up very Yay-Me-ish and then abruptly pulled myself back down to earth. Oh, Becky, life seemed so much simpler when I was in a little corner upstairs far from every one else. When people had to utilize post it notes to relay messages to me. When the only guy I was pining for was safely on the other side of the glass wall. Ugh! Where's my f-ing time machine.
I guess I haven't mentioned my night at Finn's. So, Brandon was all huffy about how his New Year's Eve went and I was going to go out anyway, and for some unknown reason, I can't turn down needy and weepy at the same time. I agreed to meet him there but soon enough regretted that decision. He whines like a girl, he bitches like a girl, and he pouts like it too. Several times during the night I told him to please just not talk. I was there to play pool, drink and just be quiet. Fortunately his buddy got there soon enough, and he stopped playing. The guy I ended up playing with, some random who I thought would be my safe haven, started the small talk process. Why me? So I ended the game with a hand shake and retreated to my MegaTouch machine. Mr. Random follows and had to be told to turn around if he insisted on talking. I really did try to be polite. Then Random comes back, I guess got a new boost of confidence with his dollar draw beer and asked if I didn't want to talk can he text message me. "No, asshole, you can't, because tomorrow you'll think you can call me, and I don't want you to call me. I don't even want you to think about calling me. You have the audacity to be clingy, irritating and persistent and I don't even want to look at you!" That's what I wanted to say, but I ended it with "No." Then and there I decided to invest in a nice inconspicuous ball cap. So I can stroll in and out of hole in the wall bars, have my drink and be left alone.
I'm sure Brandon is okay. I mean that's what we girls do. We fight and make up. I think I'll make Brandon one of the girls now. Atleast Becky knows my threshold for annoying. I told Brandon I didn't want to talk and he started asking "What's wrong?" "You want to tell me about it?" I had to smile to keep from beating him.
I'm being harsh, I love talking. I love bonding too. Bonding kicks ass. I think if I found the perfect giant tree that provided a giant shade, I would gather all my friends under that tree, (providing that it's summer time,) and we'd all bond. I would provide sweet tea and chicken salad sandwiches.
Do grown ups hang out under trees? Do they still enjoy sweet tea? Are they allowed to have friends?
I thought I was grown up. I thought I could maybe blend in. Start working a ton of overtime. Tell people I can't go out because I have to study. Start playing racquetball. Then on my way home from paying for my classes I missed Kellogg by about 5 miles because I was daydreaming about some guy I don't even know. I am out of my f-ing mind
My supervisor called me yesterday to let me know that we get an extra holiday declared by the mayor for President Ford's funeral. I was already enjoying my four day weekend and decided making it a 5 day weekend would not hurt. Yay!
Today I start on my New Year's Resolutions. Yes, I made a list. Ah, already tired just thinking about it but I must.
Ching gave me some really cute clothes last night. She kept labeling them as in, "this is a date dress," "this is a going out top," "this is when you want to be a siren in red," (yes, she really did say that) and "this is for hanging out." I can't complain, she had some really hot clothes, I can't wait to find reasons to wear them all out. Actually I wore one of them last night already.
Anyway, right now Logan is in the living room wanting to play Bingo, so much laters.
Our battles are repetitious if not broken poetry And maybe that's the attraction that you're as Self absorbed as me
You jumped to the conclusion and landed on my chest Now how am I supposed to make you see
I’ll just write this down with hopes that you'll understand I will no longer be disciplined by the frustrations of an insecure man And while I kissed your face you'll know that I will no longer apologize for you former lovers mistakes
My past is mine to keep Now who are you to question me Perhaps, someday you'll learn too that It's not our turn
You jumped to the conclusion and landed on my chest Now how am I supposed to make you see
I just write this down with hopes that you'll understand I will no longer be disciplined by the frustrations of an insecure man And while I kissed your face you'll know that I will no longer apologize for your former lovers mistakes
You set the standard for my future You set the standard for my future (lovers) You set the standard for my future You set the standard for my future (lovers) You set the standard for my future (lovers) You set the standard
I just write this down with hopes that you'll understand I can no longer be disciplined by the frustrations of an insecure man And as I kiss your face you'll know that I will no longer apologize for your former lovers mistakes
Last night was probably not the ideal New Year's Eve celebration but I made do. The X called and started inviting me over, and at one point asked if I wanted to mess around. F-ing classy, right? I was all worried and sad that he was spending New Year's Eve on his own and it turns out only because the girl he started dating was out of town. Seems like he hasn't changed or learned a bit. Glad to be rid of that one. Of course, opening the lines of communication meant a ton of calls and texts. I should have known.
Despite it all I did manage to have fun last night. Pictures for your pleasure...
Of course, the messages from The X woke me up this mornign which made me terribly pissed. Regardless, my new year might still be salvaged. I spent most of the morning lounging and watching TV. I'll be seeing Logan soon, hopefully, and then if I feel like it I might put my new year's resolutions on paper and start the process.
Tomorrow I have to go and pay for my classes and start buying books, and so on. I'm very excited for the new semester to start.
BTW, anyone know anyone from Philadelphia? My statcounter was bombarded by them this morning.
Now you see what I see. Whoever that was read up, didn't they? Well, hello, to you and drop a line. Lord knows, I get paid based on the traffic so I owe everyone.
Well, ta ta for now. I have a couch, a blanket and a TV to go back to.
